No More Statements

Photo by @pixabay via Nappy

There was a time when I would push organizations I was part of to write statements about the injustice of the day. I would approach the person(s) at the highest level to make my demand.
Predictably, a pattern would emerge, where I would:

• Explain why said statement was needed.
• Provide evidence of personal and collective pain.
• Refuse to write said statement.
• Refuse to help write the statement, then

• Statement written. Substandard. Often begrudgingly written.

I am reflecting on my root cause. Why did I need them so badly? Having studied economics in college, I know that all economic agents are assumed to be "rational". That is, each person is assumed to act in their own best interest, to maximize their utility. In plain terms, they are assumed to do what is needed to survive and thrive, to be happy. As a rational human, I also need to survive and be happy. I need to, at minimum, identify humans who are either my mortal enemies  (those who disregard my humanity, which kills me, or who stand by while others do), or those who are pro-Marian, who would fight for me. In some way, statements helped me distinguish the two groups. Looking back, this does seem perfectly rational.

But now? I no longer need statements. Not only am I no longer expecting or requesting them, I would rather not have them at all. They cloud the real issue. I have evolved to a new sense of rationality. Statements can not protect me nor help keep me alive. (Neither can verdicts.) Basically:

• Statements are words that don't bind.
• They can be performative.
• People can change their minds, or flat-out lie.
• People can write them without believing them.
• Statements are trash.

Evolving past statements also means that I will be moving differently. No more convincing or cajoling. Life is too short, and I need to live and enjoy and protect the years I have left. Rationality now means putting my happiness first. It means moving with those I know* are pro-Marian. This is bare minimum. It is what I deserve - surrounding myself with those who will fight for me, and I for them. I can live with that.

*How do I know? That is my business not to be explained to anyone.